Forget everything you thought you knew about Italian restaurants. At Hank & Mitzis in Washington, D.C., the menu isn’t static—it’s dynamic, strategic, and almost algorithmic. With three distinct daypart menus, a happy hour that borders on philanthropy, and a takeout bundle so smart it should come with a flowchart, this Shaw hotspot has engineered a diner-centric experience where the only thing you pay a premium for is missing the window. Here’s how to crack the code in 2025.
🕒 The Trio of Menus: One Kitchen, Three Identities
Hank & Mitzis doesn’t just adjust prices—it reconfigures value based on the clock:
- Dinner (Tue–Sun, 4 PM+)
- Fettuccine Bolognese: $18
- The Hank Pizza: $17
- Shrimp Fra Diavolo: $25
- Linguine with Clams: $21
- Lunch (Tue–Fri, 11:30 AM–3 PM)
- Bolognese: $14
- The Hank Pizza: $14
- Spaghetti & Meatballs: $14 (vs. $17 at dinner)
- Mafalde: $15 (vs. $19)
- Brunch (Sat–Sun, 12–4 PM)
- Pizza al Uovo ($18)—black truffle fonduta + poached egg (weekend-exclusive!)
- Lamb Ossobuco: $28 (vs. $32 at dinner)
- Shrimp Fra Diavolo: $23
- Linguine with Clams: $17
👉 Key insight: Lunch = biggest savings. Brunch = exclusive dishes + slight discounts. Dinner = full luxury. You choose your lane.
🍖 The $0.99 Meatball Paradox (Tue–Fri, 4–6 PM, Dine-In Only)
Yes, you read that right. Hank’s Meatballs—made with pork, beef, veal, tomato, pecorino, and pesto—cost $0.99 each during happy hour.
Pair with:
- Fried Calamari ($6)
- Margherita or Pizza Bianca ($7)
- House wine, rail cocktail, or Stella Artois ($6)
Total for a rich, satisfying Italian snack plate? Under $16. It’s not a promotion—it’s a philosophy of generosity.
🧀 Weekend-Only Magic: Dishes That Self-Destruct on Monday
Brunch isn’t just eggs—it’s culinary time-limited content:
- Pizza al Uovo ($18): black truffle + poached egg + asparagus
- Brunch Calzone ($16): ricotta, prosciutto cotto, Parmesan hollandaise
- Maritozzi con Panna ($10): Nutella-swirled cream bun
- Brunch Caesar ($16): bacon, eggs mimosa, anchovies
These items do not exist outside 12–4 PM on weekends. Show up late? You lose.
🧺 The $50 Italian Family Feast: A TOCK-Exclusive Masterpiece
Available only via advance TOCK order, this $50 bundle feeds four with:
- Caesar Salad for 4
- Choice of 2 Pizzas: The Mitzi, The Hank, Veggie, or Cheese & Pepperoni
- Choice of 2 Pastas: Bolognese, Mafalde, Lasagna, Spaghetti & Meatballs, or Cacio Pepe
That’s $12.50 per person for a chef-made, restaurant-quality Italian feast—no delivery fees, no markups. Just heat and enjoy.
🍝 Gluten-Free? No Surcharge. No Compromise.
Every pasta—Bolognese, Cacio Pepe, Ravioli, Mafalde—is made in-house daily. Gluten-free pasta is available for any dish at $0 extra. A benchmark for inclusivity in Italian dining.
🍸 Cocktails: Double the Serving, Same Great Price (Well, 2x)
All drinks—like the Italian Mule ($12), “You Broke My Heart, Roberto Baggio” ($14), or The Pirlo ($11)—are sold to-go as double servings for 2x the listed price. Ideal for sharing—or solo indulgence with leftovers.
🍷 Wine List: From $8 Draft Prosecco to $119 Brunello
- House Prosecco (draft): $8
- Nero d’Avola (glass): $9
- Barolo Broccardo 2016: $105
- Brunello La Togata 2013: $119
Whether you’re sipping or splurging, the cellar meets you with zero pretense and full depth.
Hank & Mitzis isn’t just serving food—it’s designing dining experiences optimized for real life. With clever timing, you get better meals for less money. With smart ordering, you unlock exclusives. And with one visit, you become a regular in spirit—if not yet in name.
Ready to play the game?
Explore the full 2025 menu and lock in your TOCK feast at
https://www.hankandmitzis.com/menus/.